Why I Quit Attending Sporting Events*

Copied from a pastor friend on the FB.

It’s the top 12 reasons why I quit going to sporting events.
1. Every time I went, they asked me for money.
2. The people I had to sit by didn’t seem very friendly.
3. The seats were too hard and not comfortable at all.
4. The coach never came to call on me.
5. The referee made a decision with which I could not agree.
6. I was sitting with some hypocrites — they came only to see what others were wearing.
7. Some games went into overtime, and I was late getting home.
8. The band played some numbers that I had never heard before.
9. The games are scheduled when I want to do other things.
10. My parents took me to too many games when I was growing up.
11. Since I read a book on sports, I feel that I know more than the coaches anyhow.
12. I don’t want to take my children, because I want them to choose for themselves what sport they like best.

*Some of you will recognize that this is a parody of the oft offered excuses people make for quitting Church. The irony, they would never, in ten thousand years, quit attending sports for the same reasons they quit attending Church – which means but one thing- they’re lying about the reasons they quit Church.


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